what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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