My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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