I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
