you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
