ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
