Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Well I just put wine in my tea
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
