no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
