Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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