Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
