You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
