Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
