her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I am naked and annoyed.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
