Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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