Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
