it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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