You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
