are you still at the devil's house?
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
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