I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
