i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
