Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Randomize
