so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
