I just saw a hot homeless man
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize