He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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