After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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