you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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