he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
