and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
