The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
