I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
