u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
