I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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