Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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