can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
