non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
