this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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