okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
