Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize