Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
