Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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