Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
His nipple licking is glorious
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