Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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