is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize