It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I just found a bag of teeth...
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
