At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
