Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize