I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I am naked and annoyed.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
