I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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