Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
