:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
