ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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